Learning How to Give

Big picture concepts are difficult to teach to a toddler. In November, I struggled to explain gratitude to Lola in terms that she could understand.  As I told her about why we celebrated Thanksgiving, I tried to explain what it meant to be grateful for the people in our lives. I ended our conversation by saying, "Are you thankful for mommy and daddy?" And then, for the weeks that followed, when anyone would ask her what she was thankful for, she would parrot "I am thankful for my mommy and daddy." Occasionally, she would also add, "And my toys!"

Last week, we talked about charity. I told her that there was a little girl who had a Christmas tree, but had no presents to open. I explained that we were going to the store to buy a gift for this little girl and that we were going to give it to someone that could deliver it to the little girl for us.

At first, Lola did not like the idea of buying a toy for someone else. Whenever I would mention what we were going to do, she would say, "No! I want the toy!" And then, I would remind her why it was important for us to buy a toy for this little girl.

After an entire of week of this conversation, we went to the store. We walked up and down the aisles filled with toys. After what seemed like eternity, Lola picked out her gift:  A yellow bicycle helmet with Transformer characters on it. I asked her, just to clarify, if that was indeed the gift she wanted to give to a little girl. She said, yes.

So, we purchased the helmet, and found a Toys-for-Tots drop off site. It was located in a large parking lot, at the corner of a busy intersection.  I found a parking spot, took Lola out of the car, and walked over to a soldier. As I gave the helmet to Lola, I told her that this man was going to give the helmet to a little girl for her. Lola quickly handed the helmet over to the soldier.  Then, I asked him if I could take a photo. He kindly obliged.

(Lola was a little overwhelmed and refused to smile for the photo.)  As we got back into the car, I wondered to myself, if she really understood what it meant to give to others.  A few minutes into our drive, she said my name in a quiet voice.

"Mommy?"
"Yes, Lola?"
"That man is going to give the helmet to a little girl?"
"Yes, honey. He is."